Fawn runs a wedding website from Maui, Hawaii Wedding Love . If you’re having a destination wedding in Hawaii, her website is very helpful to find vendors. We got to know each other and got a chance to have lunch together while visiting Oahu. I was happy she took the time to share some tips with us. Check her website out HERE for more wedding tips. Thanks Fawn!
———————
The wedding industry is very focused on the Bride, leading guys to think once they’ve proposed, their job is done and all they have to do is show up on wedding day. If you want your future husband to be more involved in the wedding planning process, here’s a few tips to ensure he’s included in your big day.
Have a discussion
You may have your dream wedding all figured out on Pinterest, but before you start making it happen, sit down with your new fiancé and figure out what you both want. This means, talking about how you want your wedding to feel (elegant, casual, fun, etc.), how big or small you want it to be, your budget, and your priorities. This is also a great time to ask him how involved he wants to be. Whether he wants to be a part of every decision or is content to let you handle all the little things, listen when he chimes in. Try to keep an open mind and don’t shoot his ideas down right away.
Give him (at least) one task
Remember when I said to prioritize? List out all of your wedding expenses from venue down to stationery, then have each of you rate each in importance from 1-5, and compare your lists. If the Groom rated something higher than you did, consider letting him take the lead on it.
If that sounds like too much work, put him in charge of things he’s naturally good at. For example, I asked my husband to take care of the food, music, and honeymoon. I still had my say, but he cut down my To Do List by communicating with the caterer and DJ, making the playlists, and handling all of our travel arrangements. Type A brides may have a hard time letting go, but there will be plenty of wedding tasks to go around, trust me.
.jpg)
Let him pick out what to wear
The Groom doesn’t get to see what you’re wearing, why not be surprised at his attire too? Just let him know the formality and give him a deadline to figure out what suits him best. If he wants your opinion, encourage him to try on different things and let him decide on his favorite. If you don’t trust his fashion sense, see the next tip.
Don’t forget his accessories
Dress, shoes, veil, jewelry, hair, bouquet, garter – brides have a lot of details that make for fun photographs. Add personality to your Groom’s look, perhaps with custom cufflinks, cool socks, shoes he can wear again (bonus points if they are in your wedding colors), a watch, tie clip, or tie with embroidery of your wedding date underneath.
.jpg)
Incorporate something meaningful to him
Every Groom has his hobbies, and the cake or cake topper can be an ideal opportunity to showcase his passions. I knew a bride who ordered a groom’s cake that was a replica of her hubby’s car. Another bride had the bottom tier of their wedding cake decorated for her husband’s favorite football team and the top tier decorated for her favorite team. Speaking of favorite teams, you can also order a special garter in those team colors. Imagine the look on your fiancé’s face when he sees it.
.jpg)
Limit your wedding talk
Resist the urge to talk about wedding planning ALL the time. If you can’t recall the last non-wedding conversation you had, he might start zoning out… and really, who could blame the guy? If you want him to be engaged in whatever you’re talking about, think about scheduling a specific time, say every #WeddingWednesday during dinner, to discuss wedding stuff. If you can’t wait that long to talk about something, tell him what you want to get out of the conversation first. Start with “The coordinator sent over this timeline she wants us to approve. Can you look it over with me?” or “I really need to vent about this really frustrating situation.” Letting the Groom know that you need to make a decision or just want him to listen will help him focus on what you need from him.
It takes two people to get married, so while it is your time to be the Bride, it is a special day for him too. Marriage is all about compromise and your engagement is a great chance to practice that! Happy wedding planning!